That’s the spirit, tiger!

fatherhoodThat’s the spirit, tiger!

Moreover, despite all your current troubles, I think you will find FATHERHOOD, one of the greatest rewards of this life…

Some practical thoughts: keep a cool head, and don’t get too official or formal on the mom in terms of the legal issues. For example, just casually give her the checks, rather do the certified mail stuff (-: the cancelled checks with her endorsement is proof enough).

Stay cool, and stay on friendly terms… if you can manage to go to hospital for delivery, that would be to your great advantage. Find out in advance the hospital procedure for the forms relating to the father’s acknowledgment of paternity, and the filing of the birth certificate. Do your best to assist the mother of your child to sign off on the forms during her hospital stay.

With that taken care of, the initial court filings for paternity will go quickly into the custody/support issues — thus avoiding DNA testing, worrying about the adoption wrench, etc.

Apart from your attorney, bone up on your negotiation skills (for the mother sounds like a real resistor). In one way or another, you are going to have to deal with her, for at least the next 18 years…

so take care in establishing the foundation of your relationship.

Remember to respond to any hostility from the mother with COMPASSION.

Good luck, and welcome to the club!

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